I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize