come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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