My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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