This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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