I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
