Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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