Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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