i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
