Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
