Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
