is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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