8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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