I'm lost and stupid without you.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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