I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Randomize
