ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
