Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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