after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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