....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
