Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize