just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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