I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Randomize
