She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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