Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
