I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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