the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
