There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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