i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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