Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
