I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
The beers last night were like the tears from god
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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