you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
