Pappa wants mamma naked
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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