I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Is her dick bigger than yours?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
