She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
