she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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