im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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