i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
