Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
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