Well apparently he's into motor boating.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize