I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
And then the night went full on bisexual.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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