Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
