So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
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