I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
