So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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