Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
