did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
