He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
