Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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