i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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