Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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