It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
