You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
