I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
