I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize